Money, Money, Money...

...or not. Picture the scene. In a remote Brazilian town on the border of Argentina and Paraguay. Yet to pay for hotel, trips and return journey to civilisation (Rio), and your debit card stops working; the only way you can access money. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.

If you don't want the details, skip to the end paragraph!

After blind panic, we tried to call Lloyds but phone didn't work. Reception managed to get through for us after about 30 mins of trying an we got through to the overseas emergency line. After alledgedly failing the first security question, we were transfered to the fraud team. As we got to the front of the queue they closed for the bank holiday. We then raced to the internet cafe to note all our transactions in readiness for the next round of security questions. Rang Lloyds again. What is our overdraft faciliy. Bugger. Ran back to internet cafe to check online. Run back to reception, ring again spend another 15 minutes explaining situation and finally pass checks. Lloyds tell us they accidently cancelled Steve's debit cards. Beth is ready to fly home and nuke Lloyd's head office. Finally discover that Beth's card may work. Race to the bank, hearts in mouths, to withdraw money. Type in 1000 reals and cross our fingers.

Waiting....whirring noises.....Beth sobs.....more waiting....more whirring noises....Steve hits wall.....'take your cash'....hooray!....'technical fault' flashes up. Beth loses 4 stone in tears alone. Running to next machine we finally manage to withdraw cash.

We then proceed to get very drunk, make a voodoo building of Lloyds Bank in Bedford and stick dental picks into it.